My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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