Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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