It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
