Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
dude. I can hear the air.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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