Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
