I think I am morally bankrupt
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
Best friends brother. Beat that.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
