dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
