Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize
