He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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