Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
