Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
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