i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
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