Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize
