theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
this just has baby written all over it
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize