drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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