I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
