i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Randomize