he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
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