im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
And then my night got REAL pukey
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
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