Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
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