fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
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