i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
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