What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
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