Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
