Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Randomize