Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
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