I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
Randomize
