Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
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