Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.