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just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
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