All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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