He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
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