I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Mom said you looked used
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
third nipple confirmed
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
