you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
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