PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Randomize