Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
Randomize