i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
Randomize
