She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
Randomize