Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
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The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
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I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day