But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
Randomize
