i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
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