Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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