do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Randomize
