I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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