She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
