All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
