Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
What a dumb baby whore.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Randomize
