i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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