what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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