you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
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The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
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I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
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