he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
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